Monday, August 06, 2007
I bloody well did jinx it ....
me and my LIFE IS GOOD ... well it's not today ...
I’m still so angry I’m almost shaking …
Today at work I got a msg from Clive to say that he’d had a call from a friend of ours to say that George had thrown blackberries at this friend’s daughter. For the duration of this story, let’s call the friend “Angry Parent” (AP) and his daughter “Dumped Daughter” (DD). George had been ‘going out’ with DD until the end of term when he dumped her via another girl’s mobile phone. We had words with him about how he did it, but George and DD are only 11.
Clive and I were both surprised that George had upset DD to the extent that AP had felt he should call Clive. So, we tried to reign George in. He didn’t answer his phone. I had one of his friends mobile numbers, but Clive had already tried that. I tried it anyway and he answered. I told him it was George’s Mum and could he please tell George to go home to his Dad’s. He did. Clive came back on Messenger and said George was home and he was getting the story from him. I left him to listen to the story and asked him to call me when he had resolved it. I then phoned the mother of another of his friends who I knew he was out with, let’s call her “Off Duty Police Officer” (ODPO). She told me that her Son, SOODPO, had just told her all about the incident and that AP had head-butted George. Hang on a minute …. Head-butted George??? !!!
She put SOODPO to tell me what happened.
They were all (George and a couple of his best friends and a large number of the rest of their school year) over the play area. DD and a couple of her friends were calling George names over his decision to go out with New Girlfriend (whom they apparently don’t like). The name calling was retaliated. DD whipped one of the boys with a holly branch. He ran off, SOODPO ran off too (I think it’s been drummed into him to avoid conflict – and he’s a genuinely nice lad too). So DD then whipped George with the holly branch, he ran to join his friends and he suggested it would be good to pelt her with blackberries. They had been playing a game where they hid each others bikes and it was George and DD’s turn. George his DD’s on a pathway (which is the generally accepted level of hiding place) whilst George’s had been thrown into a holly bush by DD. (By the way by this point I’m realising I probably had a slightly biased viewpoint SOODPO being G’s friend.) So G and his 2 friends picked up blackberries, of which G and the other friend both threw at least one at their target. She ran off, SOODPO ran away (home to ODPO) and 2 other friend followed her on their bikes. George couldn’t cos his was in a holly bush.
Minutes later AP appeared with DD and younger son. He called George over and started shouting at him. From this point on, I move to George’s account, as his friends were all so scared they deserted him. George told Clive and I this, at Clive’s house with me on loudspeaker.
AP told George he was an arsehole and a bastard and moved in to George’s face til their foreheads were touching. He was still yelling at him and forcing him backwards with his head. He told him he was going to smash his face in. He moved his head back a bit then butted him. (Remember – this is still George’s account.) George was so upset telling us this that he broke down several times. He said he was so scared he thought AP was going to kill him.
I spoke to SOODPO and asked him if he saw this. No, he went over after AP had left, to see if George was alright, and George clearly wasn’t, so he went home to tell Mum, aka ODPO that a crime had been committed. He gave me the names of 3 people he thought had seen it happen. I spoke to the mum of one and the other herself. The one I spoke to directly confirmed that she and another of G’s friends had stayed just around the corner in case anything bad happened and they saw AP head-butt George. It seems most of the kids had seen AP shouting at George.
So …. I felt we should take this to the police. I’m not sure that AP actually head-butted George, but I believe it felt like it to George. He clearly went into his face and scared the living daylights out of him. I didn’t want AP to think he could he do that to children, on the basis that his daughter was upset. Clive felt that going to the police wasn’t the right course of action. He wanted to talk to AP and give him the opportunity to apologise to George. Andy’s opinion was that if AP was remorseful and realised he’d made a mistake then going to the police might not be necessary. So I agreed for Clive to try talking to AP and if he was remorseful and agreed to apologise we’d leave it there.
Clive did and T (aka Canadian Girlfriend) went too, as suggested by ODPO. I sat with kids. Clive and T returned with AP in tow, wishing to apologise. He did but with the precursor that he didn’t have all the facts when he challenged George. And now he did, he wished to apologise. I felt I had to point out that even without the facts he was out of order behaving like that (although I’m sure Clive had already covered this). So, AP apologised, shook hands with George and left. And at the start of this blogpost I still felt angry to shaking point. Now, after a beer and a half and the cathartic effect of blogging, I feel a little better. I just hope George does too.
(that was Donna btw, not Crash)
I’m still so angry I’m almost shaking …
Today at work I got a msg from Clive to say that he’d had a call from a friend of ours to say that George had thrown blackberries at this friend’s daughter. For the duration of this story, let’s call the friend “Angry Parent” (AP) and his daughter “Dumped Daughter” (DD). George had been ‘going out’ with DD until the end of term when he dumped her via another girl’s mobile phone. We had words with him about how he did it, but George and DD are only 11.
Clive and I were both surprised that George had upset DD to the extent that AP had felt he should call Clive. So, we tried to reign George in. He didn’t answer his phone. I had one of his friends mobile numbers, but Clive had already tried that. I tried it anyway and he answered. I told him it was George’s Mum and could he please tell George to go home to his Dad’s. He did. Clive came back on Messenger and said George was home and he was getting the story from him. I left him to listen to the story and asked him to call me when he had resolved it. I then phoned the mother of another of his friends who I knew he was out with, let’s call her “Off Duty Police Officer” (ODPO). She told me that her Son, SOODPO, had just told her all about the incident and that AP had head-butted George. Hang on a minute …. Head-butted George??? !!!
She put SOODPO to tell me what happened.
They were all (George and a couple of his best friends and a large number of the rest of their school year) over the play area. DD and a couple of her friends were calling George names over his decision to go out with New Girlfriend (whom they apparently don’t like). The name calling was retaliated. DD whipped one of the boys with a holly branch. He ran off, SOODPO ran off too (I think it’s been drummed into him to avoid conflict – and he’s a genuinely nice lad too). So DD then whipped George with the holly branch, he ran to join his friends and he suggested it would be good to pelt her with blackberries. They had been playing a game where they hid each others bikes and it was George and DD’s turn. George his DD’s on a pathway (which is the generally accepted level of hiding place) whilst George’s had been thrown into a holly bush by DD. (By the way by this point I’m realising I probably had a slightly biased viewpoint SOODPO being G’s friend.) So G and his 2 friends picked up blackberries, of which G and the other friend both threw at least one at their target. She ran off, SOODPO ran away (home to ODPO) and 2 other friend followed her on their bikes. George couldn’t cos his was in a holly bush.
Minutes later AP appeared with DD and younger son. He called George over and started shouting at him. From this point on, I move to George’s account, as his friends were all so scared they deserted him. George told Clive and I this, at Clive’s house with me on loudspeaker.
AP told George he was an arsehole and a bastard and moved in to George’s face til their foreheads were touching. He was still yelling at him and forcing him backwards with his head. He told him he was going to smash his face in. He moved his head back a bit then butted him. (Remember – this is still George’s account.) George was so upset telling us this that he broke down several times. He said he was so scared he thought AP was going to kill him.
I spoke to SOODPO and asked him if he saw this. No, he went over after AP had left, to see if George was alright, and George clearly wasn’t, so he went home to tell Mum, aka ODPO that a crime had been committed. He gave me the names of 3 people he thought had seen it happen. I spoke to the mum of one and the other herself. The one I spoke to directly confirmed that she and another of G’s friends had stayed just around the corner in case anything bad happened and they saw AP head-butt George. It seems most of the kids had seen AP shouting at George.
So …. I felt we should take this to the police. I’m not sure that AP actually head-butted George, but I believe it felt like it to George. He clearly went into his face and scared the living daylights out of him. I didn’t want AP to think he could he do that to children, on the basis that his daughter was upset. Clive felt that going to the police wasn’t the right course of action. He wanted to talk to AP and give him the opportunity to apologise to George. Andy’s opinion was that if AP was remorseful and realised he’d made a mistake then going to the police might not be necessary. So I agreed for Clive to try talking to AP and if he was remorseful and agreed to apologise we’d leave it there.
Clive did and T (aka Canadian Girlfriend) went too, as suggested by ODPO. I sat with kids. Clive and T returned with AP in tow, wishing to apologise. He did but with the precursor that he didn’t have all the facts when he challenged George. And now he did, he wished to apologise. I felt I had to point out that even without the facts he was out of order behaving like that (although I’m sure Clive had already covered this). So, AP apologised, shook hands with George and left. And at the start of this blogpost I still felt angry to shaking point. Now, after a beer and a half and the cathartic effect of blogging, I feel a little better. I just hope George does too.
(that was Donna btw, not Crash)
